1-20-21 was just as important for our sons as our daughters

Yesterday, as Kamala Harris was sworn into office and as Amanda Gorman issued an invitation to our nation to not just find light, but to be light, I pictured my girls in school watching it unfold. And I wept. I was glad they didn't have to witness me, but I was overjoyed they were witnessing the thing that caused such an outpouring of relief and celebration.

I'm not such an idealist that I don't also realize that although yesterday was a door flung open wide, it was not a completion. That work is only just beginning. But yesterday wasn't nothing either.

Yesterday made me think about all the moments in my lifetime when women have paused and collectively insisted that they be recognized in the fullness of their personhood. For example, during the Me Too movement, women spoke up and demanded that their personhood, and specifically their bodies, be respected. Yesterday went deeper in, still. Yesterday, my daughters saw personhood affirmed at many levels--race, gender, and youth. Before them stood proud a woman who will lead our country and another whose words reminded us that we all have a responsibility to do better. 

In the Creation story of the Hebrew Bible, God creates Eve and calls her ezer kenegdo. Ezer, a word that is hard to translate literally into English, means either "to be a rescuer" or "to be strong." This word is often used in other parts of the Bible as a name for God, as our rescuer in times of trouble. Unfortunately, many English translations use the word "helper" in its place, a weaker synonym that has often been used to represent women as humanity's support staff. Kenegdo means "opposite as to him" or "corresponding." A woman is no better or less than a man. This picture of womanhood is not prescriptive (as it's often been used), but descriptive. Men and women were created as equal persons uniquely equipped to lead with strength, courage, and compassion. Goodness knows our world needs every ounce of that we can muster.

When Kamala Harris took her oath of office, when Amanda Gorman recited her beautiful words, what my daughters and son saw was women whose personhood was affirmed not just in a physical way, but in every way, in accordance with the full measure of their gifts. 

To be a woman, even in this day and age, is to live as a divided self. This is what I mean: We are bodies, lovers, mothers, leaders, thinkers, citizens; rarely, are we afforded the luxury of being seen as all these things at once. I suppose it's human nature to categorize. She's a stay-at-home mom. She's a professor. She's intellectual. She's nurturing. She's a person of faith. She's a Democrat. But can a woman not be all of these together, bringing all the pieces of her identity into every place she serves? That is personhood - to take up space in every area of one's life and to be seen as varied and whole at the same time. 

Hollywoodlife.com

Wholeness is what our sons saw yesterday. They saw a man and a woman standing side by side not as husband and wife (also a beautiful picture), but as equal partners positioned and ready to lead a nation by the power of their shared gifts and abilities. They saw women represented in the fullness of their personhood. Stunning intellect, leadership, authority, and yes, even beauty. Because we do not have to lay down one part of our personhood to take up another. And we will continue to insist, continue to show up as whole persons, beautifully and uniquely equipped to do many kinds of work in a broken and weary world.  

That is why we rejoiced with our daughters yesterday. And we also rejoiced with our son. All three of them seeing for the very first time in a long time what it looks like when we see differences not as stumbling blocks, but as our shared and collective strength. If there is one thing that makes me feel proud when I think of the United States, it is the rich potential that lies within our differences. We can be stronger for them. But it will require us first to see each other as whole and equal.

Yesterday was that vision. It may have just been ceremony, but it was also possibility. It was also invitation. 

"See," said the beautiful ceremony to the people in the audience at the Capitol, and to the men, women and children at home and work and in classrooms all over the country (maybe around the world). "See what is possible. Now. Go. And do that."